Ok, so I'm a day late on writing things up here, but I did start yesterday. I had a fab New Years, but drinking and talking late into the night made me face up to a few issues that I've been avoiding. I finally admitted to the turmoil I've been having, including the darkest side of it which could be very self-destructive if left to fester. Not only did I admit to my friend, I admitted to an online community that I've been part of for nearly 4 years now. I've been avoiding them as I just didn't want to be posting false jollity when that was the last thing I was feeling. Several times I've started to post to my blog there and then felt that I was being stupid and somewhat selfish for sharing such thoughts and never went through with actually posting what I'd written.
All sounds a bit depressing so far, doesn't it?!!
Anyway, the upshot is that I've received a wonderful response from all sides and feel so very uplifted by the kind words and support that are being sent my way.
So, yesterday was about recognising what lovely friends I have, both virtual and in the real world. I am truly lucky.
It was also a beautiful day, filled with the first proper sunshine we've seen for a while. The kids were well behaved and I really felt ready to face the new year with some gusto.
Today, I listened to my lovely daughter E singing. She was singing her nativity songs, but slowly adapted them until they were totally different from where she started. She was happy and cheeky, as a 5 yr old should be, carefree, and yet filled with the self-importance that comes so naturally to her.
As I tucked her into bed, and we read The Hungry Caterpillar, she was all giggles and smiles. I got to blow raspberries on her neck, and smother her in kisses and cuddles. What can be better?
And finally, I've had a bath run for me too - which I shall be enjoying shortly!
